And you know you've had a special birthday when

• Birthday celebration continues on the next day . with me getting only a 4 hour sleep on my birthday .
• Its not even 12 and calls start coming , with a friend already on phone and not letting you put him on hold. Everybody wants to be the first one to wish . It strikes 12 and before anyone , my sister gets to be the first one :D
• Its 12 something and your mother's stuffing your mouth with coffee,almond,choco chips Kwality Walls as your hand's busy holding the phone with calls pouring from friends .
• Your father takes a day off to come visit you . 2 a.m he reaches with your brother and a special chocolate sandesh (my favorite ) from Calcutta. 
• Of all the expected wishes , the biggest , your crush drops you a birthday wish ;)
• You go off to sleep with a smile , to wake up knowing two of your college friends are outside your gate , having come a 7 hour train journey :) . "Your house is somewhat yellowish " he had to say to convince me on the phone. It was a big surprise , I couldn't stop asking them "how " and telling my mother " yes I did give them my address but was not expecting more than a gift ! "  
• One of your besties shouting at the other , thinking he hurt me on my birthday .
• Your juniors call you up to wish ( and its best not to save phone numbers ; its best when somebody unexpectedly calls you )
• Your friend has done some online photoshop card kinda thing for you , and an old friendship-turned-crush-turned-friendship-turned-cold-war guy who's not even in your friend list likes that photo .
• You are in a gift shop , and your 10 year old friend asks you to pick a gift ; and you chose a bookmark .
• You cut a rasgulla instead of cake , for you have eaten way too much on the previous day .
• You have things ,that if written here , would surely get you a spoilt tag 3:)
• Being an insomniac for the past 6 months you finally get a sound sleep at 11:30 p.m. ;)

The Good , The Bad , The Ugly

         I was sitting idle , my hand recklessly scrolling on the mouse and eyes on the laptop screen . This being my daily routine for weeks now , and stagnant my life. Sleeping the extra hours to kill time , my messenger showing me online far more than ever , my brain's been practically dormant with me being unable to recapitulate on my life. Forget about my future , I fail to comprehend even my present. I have been no less than a  nomad in the world that exists in my head . To make things pathetic, even that seems vague .
        Am interrupted ( that's more than welcome ) by a phone call , "Avani" the caller id flashes ,she being an old friend I have broken all records of talking on the phone with. Skipping all sorts of formal and even informal greetings ,I jump to cursing her for being in I-don't-know-in-which-world for so long.While most of us went out of Ranchi for higher education ,she chose to stay here . The very fact , helping the least in being in touch.It is a moment , a-no-need-to-TRY-to-start-a-conversation moment. As we talk , the whole first year of my college life sums up in front of me. The difference comes clear right between her and me , between what I was an year back and what I am now !
       It was after the 12th boards ,no one of us knew what exactly we wanted from life , where exactly our next step would take us , all we knew was our quest for exposure and experiences. Two years hence, I can actually see myself spelling the word .Going back to the my first vacation , Changes were profoundly visible. Everybody at home talked about it , about the confidence , that missing hesitancy , the above-what-others-might-think attitude . The easier changes gets noticed (and also appreciated) , the quickly one gets accustomed to them. Habituated to the new ME , I stood in front of this crossroad . neither knowing where it would lead me to nor where I came from. The latter still awaits its answer, while the former just got one as I put down the phone. And this is why my daily chats with this classmate or the other acquaintance is nowhere close to an hour's talk with an old friend.
   
 

  Memories of my first year appeared like the unsolved jigsaw pieces , those that now frame the perfect picture . I might not remember of how we landed up watching a movie in the train engine outside Nehru or when I made this new friend or how many classes I bunked or for that matter the number of Physics classes that I did attend  . But each and every day counted . I had never been busier before ,never had conversations that mattered more ,never felt like taking a responsibility , never seen myself fall and rise up so soon . It was never before that experiences existed more in the real world than my imagination. I hardly remember having dreams in Kgp , reality had a lot more happening.Clouded with so many "things" , I had little time to see where the flow of incidents was taking me , meanwhile I made my share of mistakes , frankly a little more . Mistakes that I don't regret , for after three years of following a goal set up by I don't know who ,and still having that big question mark of my life , following nothing makes no difference now.
       With  the Good , - the memories , lessons , experiences , growth and change , the Bad -Grades that I (as of now) don't regret much , comes the Ugly . The bitter truth that one day I might have to repent for the Bad and regret for the excess of Good. The deep hidden question of me doing what in the top institute of India . The ugly fact of everything appearing blur to my eyes now . The girl who was thirsty for the exposure has got one , and its time to get some new goals set,those that can clear the blur . Its time the experience I got paves the path for new ones to come.